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May 15th, 2007
02:14 pm - afros, belly dancers, hot peppers, and whales
i need someone/something to light a fire under my ass. i don't understand why i don't want to do anything.
work sucks... but what do you do? how many people really enjoy their jobs? i hate my job. i do. it bores me to death. but i can't get another job making what i make here.
my life is ruled by money. how sad. i hate money. i always will hate money.
we should be bartering. burning man.
Current Location: work
Current Mood:  blah
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March 23rd, 2007
08:47 am - still alive.
well it's been quite a while since i've made an entry here. sadly, i don't have a whole lot worth mentioning. bought a house in december. it's nice to have a place, but there are responisibilites. not to mention i will be paying on this house for the next 30 years. i feel tied down, but it's a good thing, isn't it? i suppose time will tell. that's all i have to say about myself. ha!
chris wiley got married. chris baber is moving back to the spa. chris terrell had a baby! andy turned 17!!! haven't heard from roy since december - anything anything anything could be going on in his life right now and i'd have no clue. started hanging out with david who is engaged and has a baby on the way. poor mina has pneumonia.
what an exciting fucking life i lead.
blehhhhhhhh.
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October 23rd, 2006
02:52 pm - tastes like skunk
i'm ok. i'm not letting any assholes get to me. :)
i'm happy that the summer is over. i hate humidity. i hate temps higher than 85 degrees. that crap is for the birds. okay!
i so want to go camping. haven't been in so long, and i've just had the itch lately. only problem - no camping gear and no money to get camping gear.
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ accepting donations $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
Current Location: work
Current Mood:  tired
Current Music: none :(
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September 26th, 2006
10:36 am - hmm
i've been using the myspace blog more than lj. i don't know why. it's just convenient i suppose.
everything is crazy. the little bro moved in with me. he's something else. and dear god, teenage boys eat way too much food. i spent $330 at frikkin walmart. we'll see how long this stuff lasts...
work is hectic most of the time.
i'm chillin every night, now. seems i would have gotten this out of my system when i was younger. i'm backasswards, i suppose.
ready for vacation... going on a cruise in december -- cozumel, belize, guatemala, and then back to mexico. woo! too bad i'm as broke as i am... haha.
until next time...
<3<3<3j
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August 18th, 2006
10:29 am
work has been killing me. summer is over, and so are the stupid conferences and workshops that go with it. thank god.
vacation is planned for december -- hope i can wait that long.
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June 12th, 2006
03:05 pm - it's been a minute
work is driving me crazy. i'm always super bored or super busy, there is no middle ground. i hate that.
i may be buying a house.
i want to go to europe next summer, but i'll have to scrape together $3000. hmm.
it was nice to see my dad. though, it was rough to go 3 weeks and not have a break...
and my bro has been stopping by a lot. he hasn't smoked pot in almost 2 whole freakin weeks. i'm happy for him. none of us, he included, thought he could do it. it was cold turkey, too... none of that gradual shit. so that's awesome. but weird at the same time, because now we don't smoke when he comes over. *shrug* it's cool.
my dad bought the 1st and 2nd seasons of deadwood while he was here. now we're all hooked. lol. it's a good frikkin show, man!
anyway. that is all, i suppose. i was just thinking about how long i've had my lj. it's kinda weird. hrmmmph...
Current Location: the office
Current Mood:  hopeful
Current Music: none
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April 27th, 2006
12:38 pm - i'm old.
i can't believe i hit 23 and still havent gone back to school. what a loser.
my car is fucked from a hail storm we hit on the way back from saint louis ON MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY. god loves me, doesn't he? of course i dont have money right now and my deductible is $500. awesome.
i got a digital camera for my birthday. i love it but at the same time am not sure if it suits me. i've always prefered hard photos and negatives to digital pics. the quality just isn't the same. i guess the quality would be the same when you start spending thousands of dollars on them. but anyway.
so here i am, back at work. and nobody is here. seriously. all of the math department, minus tiffany, is in stl for some math convention. tiffany is in spain (biiiiiiiitch!!!). karen is in ohio. quentin is out for a literacy thing. matt and joel have left for little rock. cecil is out somewhere. jason is on vacation in atlanta. i think lisa is here. but she is working with people on item writing... and they went out to lunch. so ya... it's just me. that kinda sucks. but i got back and the group got me a $25 mastercard for my birthday and a $15 dollar card for mcaslisters for admin professionals day. woohoo.
my dad is planning to visit. i'm excited and nervous. i hope this goes well.
i wish i had no cares or worries. wait... fuck those smelly hippies!
Current Location: office
Current Mood:  pensive
Current Music: the humming a/c
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April 11th, 2006
08:32 am - me
i'm sick.
i'm tired.
fed up.
i'm worn out.
bored.
upset.
i'm exhausted.
frustrated.
i want to be done with this shit.
i need a break.
i want to go away.
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March 16th, 2006
08:46 am - possibly, maybe, probably manic
things change so fast. one minute i'm happy, or at least thinking positive, then a shit storm. i hate getting information through the grape vine and not knowing what is really going on. fuck. i'm just too easily affected, right.
the new kids that are running the exchange seem to be very cool. i'm very pleased to have a venue in hot springs. tonight the mathematicians are playing, which i was really excited about when i first heard... but now i dont really want to be around anyone. especially not all the kids that will be at the show. i will go, though; to support the venue. hopefully, the music will be upbeat and help void any bad feelings i am having.
Current Mood:  lonely
Current Music: metal hearts
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February 10th, 2006
09:17 am - internal struggles
blehhhh. blahhhh. ughhhh.
i want to have goals, but feel comfortable with who and where i am right now. i want to do things to better myself, but not because i think i'm inadequate.
these are things i think to myself often.
if you looked this way...
if you dressed that way...
if you were more outgoing...
if you had finished school...
if you hadn't messed with him...
if you would talk more and think less...
if you would worry less...
if you would let yourself have more fun...
if you had stronger convictions...
if you would just say no...
if you would just put yourself out there...
if you would just stand your ground...
if you had more confidence...
if you would actually work towards the goals you set...
if you would make up your mind...
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emptypromises's journal